April 22nd, 2010:  New Air

I believe I’ve shifted gears.  I’m getting used to new air.  In my last entry I was talking about riding new energy.  Well, it’s still there and with it I’m learning how to breathe new air.  I wake up and feel a lot of energy which, at other times, I would have been thrown off into the bushes and felt fear.

But now that I’m riding the crest of the wave I’m breathing more deeply and inhaling more air.  Years ago I was attending my first and only sweat lodge.  We were out in the woods in rural Wisconsin and by a river where a sweat lodge had been built on private land.  The first part of the evening was spent in gathering rather large stones and then building the fire hot enough to really may the stones glow red.  That takes awhile.  There was a lot of talk around the fire and since this was my first time I was nervous and was shrinking back from the fire because it was so hot.  The lodge leader kept telling me to breathe more deeply.  I didn’t do it but kept being bothered by the heat and moving back from the fire.  About the third time she told me she said it firmly, breathe deeply! 

I got the message and consciously began breathing deeply and the heat quit bothering me.  I was amazed.  I don’t know how that was.  Could it be that the energy within me equalized when I breathed more deeply and so I didn’t feel the heat?

I thought of that story when I felt so much energy inside me.  Breathe deeply.  It works.  I could absorb the anxiety and even myself and ride/steer myself solidly from within.

After finding these fresh energy legs I’ve been feeling good and also feeling like I’m ready for something to happen.  I waked Dudie (bff dog) yesterday afternoon and was telling myself that I think I was ready for something to happen.  About one hour later I went online and discovered that through Match.com someone had written me who actually seemed like a viable lead on my partner quest.  That blew me away.  Someone actually emailed ME.  I had been out there emailing guys from Alaska to Hawaii to Florida usually with no reply or a thanks, but no thanks.   (Oh, I did receive a nice email from a 28 year old lad who thought I was sexy but I thanked him for the boost and turned him down.)

But, I am ready and breathing and someone knocked on my door.  We shall see.  And now is where the breathing is REALLY important!

With Love, Connie