August 23rd, 2010:  Death and Expansion

My air conditioner died.  While this is Wisconsin we have had a rather eerie summer of dew points consistently 10 to 20 points higher than the humidity levels which have been high as well.  My ac worked like a Trojan 24/7 for weeks never a vacation and constantly spitting water and the cold air looking like fog as it hit the warm air.

This is important to me because I’ve always been sensitive to my surroundings and when it comes to my basic comforts I can feel like God is fucking with me if something like happens.  I become a victim.  My survival instincts kick in and I’m planning my escape to cooler air as if I’m calling for the crash cart.

But my beliefs have shifted.  Hallelujah.  The emergency systems can stand down.  I’m good.  Actually I’m better than good because I can use this contrasting situation as a reason to expand.  Abraham (see side panel) calls problems contrast.  Contrast is something not wanted which causes us to ask for what we do want.  This goes on every day and most of the time we may not be conscious of the process because the asking is in most cases an energetic “rocket of desire” as Abraham says that we launch and that our Source answers…immediately. 

So when my beloved ac dies I’m shooting off a rocket big time for cooler air.  But more than that I’m asking for me to feel better.  I’m asking for a stronger, less fearful self as well.  I’m also asking for a place to live with central air.  That’s the ticket!

Now all of that has been launched as well as some things I haven’t consciously named and it has been answered as well.  Ask and it is given.  So where the hell is it?  All things material are vibrational before they manifest.  The smallest particle of matter is thought.  So my stuff is being held for me vibrationally including my improved self that does not need conditions to be good in order to feel good.

So, I quickly got a repair person to take care of the ac and I took the bounce that the contrast had provided for me.  I became/expanded to that person who is good without ac, who feels strong, joyous even all by herself even with the sweat trickling down.  And that is the real gift in this whole deal.  I feel better.

I also decided to trust my body as well and not worry about what it was going to do in the heat or how it was going to betray me with all kinds of weirdness from crack sweat to a heart attack.  Well, that is a bit dramatic but you get the picture.  I decided that I have this amazing collection of billions of cells that are working together and have the capacity to do amazing things if I can get out of their way.

So as sappy as it sounds I sent love to every cell in my body with the thought of great appreciation for all that it does and all that it is capable of doing and let go of the worry.  I mean it.  I let go.

So, despite my lack of ac I feel enormous appreciation of it’s temporary demise and I feel joyous expansion.  That may sound OTT but it’s true.

So where ever you are I wish you well.  Love, Connie

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